Hi Dice,

It’s Josh. Josh Beckett. You might remember me from our 2+ seasons together on the Boston Red Sox.

I thought I might offer you a few pointers after my latest game against the Detroit Tigers on Wednesday:

• You’ll notice my pitch count from Wednesday night: 109. I average between 110 and 120 a game, and I also get well into the seventh or eighth inning in the majority of my starts. You have yet to make it into the sixth all season. I struck out nine and only walked two. You’ll also notice I have a pissed off look on my face when Tito comes to the mound to take me out of the game. You’ve been playing ball in the US for a while now but you still might not recognize it. That look on my face? That’s competitive aggression and intensity. You should try it.

• Speaking of which, I had a nice little no-hitter going, even if Laird tried to bunt on me. Whatever. He got beaned his next at bat. Intentional? Naaaahhhhhhh.

• Hey, I meant to tell you: that WBC Champions cap? Looks AWESOME, bro. Seriously. How’s that arm fatigue doing? I figured you had plenty of time to rest up with three weeks on the DL and I only ask because when the starters are able to pitch 6-7 complete innings, the boys in the bullpen don’t get arm fatigue. And we both know how tough that arm fatigue can be.

• But look, it’s not all negative. I also meant to congratulate you on that spectacular first win of the season the other night in Detroit. Great stuff, man. All five innings and 2,387 pitches. That was great, especially since you also had 4 wild pitches the start before. I haven’t seen anything like those wild pitches since grammar school ball at recess. In fact, nobody in the Red Sox club has seen anything like it since Milt Gaston did it in 1929. Well done.

• We all know I’m the ace. No denying it. But Lester is hungry. Really hungry. And the only guy hungrier than him is Bucholz. Just between you and me, between a world class starter in the AL East and. . . you, the word is Bucholz is watching your starts and throwing fits. He’s destroying the minors, and the kid is just aching to get back into the majors. He was dating Erica Ellyson, the Penthouse Pet. . . and she’s not gonna hang around for a guy in the minors. Get my drift?

• Here’s the bottom line. I think you have the stuff to throw in the AL East. . . what you’re missing is the balls. Not the outside of the strike zone balls, those you have. I mean that pissed off hot feeling in your stomach; the shoulder tightening intensity you feel when that big hitter steps to the plate that makes you want to fan him.

So please, take my constructive criticism to heart. It’s all meant in the spirit of winning. There’s plenty of video of my starts if you want to watch them, and I think I speak for the whole pitching staff when I say we’d really like you to start implementing some of these suggestions this weekend against Texas.

Until then, I remain,

Josh Beckett